954...Bill Clinton Honourary Degree From McGill

October 16th is the big day at McGill, the prestigious Montreal university that will confer an honourary degree on President William Clinton.

Fark.com comments that the honourary degree comes with a lifetime supply of poutine, a stripper of his choice and one free drink at The Village (good Monday to Thursday, 4-6 pm).

Ironically, reports the Canadian Press, President Clinton will make the trip just before another ex-president heads to Montreal. His successor, George W. Bush, will deliver a speech several days later at the city’s Queen Elizabeth hotel.

WFDS

940...All Good Dogs Go To Heaven

But first they must go to church and according to Karen Seidman of Canwest News Service there is finally a church that is dog friendly to the max.

It is Christ Church Beaurepaire in Beaconsfield, a suburb of Montreal on the West Island.

The first Paws and Pray service will be held at the church this Sunday.

WFDS

908...Selecting Out In Montreal

Louise Harel, who is one of the two major candidates in the November 1st Montreal mayoralty election, the other being two time mayor Gérald Tremblay, has decided that she is not comfortable enough in the language of 12 per cent of the population of Montreal, English, and the language preferred by the 20 per cent of the city that are cheerfully referred to as allophones, English, so she will not debate Mayor Tremblay on CTV Montreal.

The Montreal Gazette rolls with that news on its front page this morning informing all that the half-hour debate would have taken place Oct. 25, a week before the Nov. 1 vote, and Ms. Harel, a former Parti Quebecois minister, had been offered any combination of simultaneous translation. Not good enough.

Ms. Harel was the minister of municipal affairs who forced amalgamation in communities like Hull/Aylmer/Gatineau and in Montreal and and her track record indicates that she doesn't listen to others' opinions unless they agree with her.

She has selected out the 12 per cent anglo vote and the 20 per cent allophone vote but is crushing the incumbent among the 68 per cent of Montrealers who are francophones.

WFDS

880...Gotta Ask:Why/How R Tories Ahead In Polls?

As Detroit and Montreal are to cities, they are where the unthinkable happens on a regular basis; the Conservative Party of Canada is to political parties, they are where the unthinkable happens on a regular basis.

Yet, and let's be realistic folks, if an election were held today Stephen Harper and his crew would get more seats than the Liberals and form yet another minority parliament.

What the f'ck do these guys have to do to convince Canadians that they are unfit to govern?

Take this week. The Health Minister's department sends body bags, properly called post mortem kits because it is more than just a bag, there are toe tags and everything, before vaccine to remote communities in Manitoba, remote aboriginal communities.

They are going to skate. Sure, the native leaders are pissed. "It was insulting," said David Harper, Grand Chief of the Manitoba Keewatinowi Okimakanak, quoted in today's Globe and Mail. "Body bags may be part of flu preparations, but so is medications. Why do we get body bags before we get medication?" The chattering classes are also pissed but the inbetweens, the ones who decide elections, not so much.

Wait, there is more.

The former national caucus chair, married to a minister, Helena Guergis, Rahim Jaffer, got busted for drinking and driving and cocaine. What makes this ironic in the GOP kind of way is Mr. Jaffer, the only Conservative to lose in Alberta last year, pinned his electoral hopes in 2008, as reported on Global National last night, on smearing the NDP as pro drugs with attack ads. The arrest of an anti drug champion on multiple drug charges is, well, ironic, doncha think?

Yet the Conservatives are going to skate and spin their way out of this too and continue to lead in the polls.

WTF?

WFDS

817...Bend It With Beckham

In Montreal where the MLS, Major League Soccer, is poised to put a team for the 2012 season the New York Times reports that David Beckham would like to be involved as an owner of the team along with Montreal gazillionaire Joey Saputo.

The Philadelphia Union will join the league next season, while Vancouver and Portland enter the fold in 2011.

MLS commissioner Don Garber has confirmed numerous times that he wants Montreal in the league. The city is a nice fit for both Mr. Beckham and the league. It has a cosmopolitan population, a nice fan base and also has a strong fashion industry component which would be great for Victoria Beckham who is a player in that industry.

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795...Maudit Anglais

Hostie.

Muhammed Ahmad Munir, a student visiting from Pakistan, was kicked off the No. 66 bus Friday morning for having the audacity, you know how immigrants are, the audacity to ask the bus driver a question in e n g l i s h. In Montreal.

This incident, reported in the Montreal Gazette, happened in Notre Dame de Grace, an area of Montreal that has more than a few of the dreaded maudit anglais along with a large proportion of les autres and even juifs.

The Société de transport de Montréal [STM] bus driver was so taken with the boldness of Muhammed Ahmad Munir's cheekiness that she proceeded to call police, saying she had an aggressive passenger, and she kicked the rest of the passengers off the bus as well.

Let's face it, if you are going to be an ass, go all the way.

WFDS

787...Oh Oh

An ill wind is blowing in the east end of Montreal where La Presse, the french broadsheet in Montreal, told its employees yesterday that if their unions don't work with management to cut costs they are going to shut down December 1st of this year.

Merry f'ing Christmas.

WFDS

702...Toronto And Montreal Rivalry Redux

You know how those two cities are.

Toronto gets a subway; Montreal gets a subway.

Montreal gets a baseball team; Toronto gets a baseball team.

Toronto's blue collar workers go on strike; Montreal's blue collar workers go on strike.

This is taking it a bit too far. The headline on the front of the Gazette this morning is that the blue collar workers on the Island of Montreal are poised to walk.

Stay tuned for more deets.

WFDS

698...Quebec Cash Grab

It did not meet the smell test in either British Columbia or Ontario but it is a nice way to grab cash so of course Quebec has decided to make their pilot project on the use of photo radar/cash machine a go.

For residents of the National Capital it is a good news/bad news story: The Ottawa Citizen, which serves Gatineau, the third largest market in Quebec, is running a story from CanWest News Service that indicates that the province has 15 of the little buggers but that none of them are in Gatineau.

Six of the Kodak's are on the Island of Montreal and the greatest in terms of potential revenue is on the Decarie Expressway at the Ville Marie Expressway where out of about 5,001 warning letters taken because of snapshots taken during the trial period fully 2,744 were taken on the southbound part of the Decarie, just past Atwater where it merges with the Ville Marie.

The speed limit on the Decarie is 70 km/hr. If you are familiar with the Decarie, driving 70 km/hr is an invitation to die.

WFDS

654...Morgentaler's First Abortion Clinic May Close

Bill 34, passed earlier in the year by the National Assembly of Quebec, threatens to shut Dr. Henry Morgentaler's first clinic, opened illegally over 40 years ago.

The front page story in the Montreal Gazette states that the threat of closing is not coming from anti-abortion protesters, who have targeted the clinic for 30 years, but from a Quebec law that will govern how special medical clinics, offering specialized services, provide such.

It is not the end of abortion per se in Montreal; although the Morgentaler Clinic and two others like it are slated to close in September if they do not comply with Bill 34, Montreal and area hospitals should be able to pick up the slack.

WFDS

642...Being Fat Will Set You Free

Or at least let you smuggle a pistol into jail. The Houston Chronicle, and Houston is one of my fave cities, like Montreal it is a city where the unthinkable happens on a regular basis, reports that 500 pound George Vera, who was in the Harris County Jail for allegedly burning CDs and selling them, smuggled in a load 9mm pistol in the folds of his fat.

This all came to light when he inexplicably told a guard about his malfeasance.

The 25 year old was charged with possession of a firearm in a correctional facility.

WFDS

620...Alcohol In The News

Montreal is one of the world's great drinking towns. So it comes as no surprise to moi that McGill University in Montreal would be a leader in research on how alcohol affects the body.

In a study I heard on CFRA this morning and read about on Newsmax.com, McGill University researchers have determined that the more one drinks the more one's chance of getting certain cancers, esophageal, colon and lung, increases dramatically.

Esophageal went up 7o per cent with the heaviest drinkers, those who drank a minimum of 3 drinks a day over a decade. Colon went up 80 points and lung cancer 50.

Dr. Andrea Benedetti noted that casual drinkers were barely affected "It is those that drink every day or multiple times a day that are at risk."

WFDS

558...Tories And Gays And Montreal

Jennifer Ditchburn, Canadian Press reports that the Montreal Gay Pride thingy, Divers-Cite, has been refused funding, they wanted less than 200 000 shekels, 155 k to be precise, in part one would presume because of the fall out over the federal government, also known as the Conservative Party of Canada, got over giving Pride in Toronto money.

Ironically, in the hoo haw over Toronto Pride, Divers-Cite incurred the wrath of many in the gay community by stating that they had never been treated with anything but respect by the Tories.

Until now that is.

Paul Girard, the marketing director for the event, was told that all his ducks were in order and that the file had been sent to Minister Tony Clement's office for approval. Tuesday he was informed ixnay to the oneymay aulpay.

The event, which happens next month, features Latin American singer India, Marjo from Quebec and from the Pittsburgh Pirates 1979 World Series Champions, Sister Sledge.

But don't expect Stephen Harper, our beloved Prime Minister, to cruise down Ste. Catherine Est for Divers-Cite.

WFDS

543...Swine Flu Hits A Hole

I guess that is what you would call Melissa Auf der Maur, wouldn't you?

Or an ex Hole.

Any way you shake it, the Montreal born bass player, who also was a Smashing Pumpkin, got the swine flu back in June and in a Canadian Press article on line she said that the flu was a roller coaster of different symptoms starting with shortness of breath and then fever and, for want of a better word, un fever, with her temperature vacillating between 95 and 101 degrees.

Miss Auf der Maur says the best thing about having the swine flu is that she has had the swine flu and thinks that she is probably immune to it. She offers up sage advice to you: "...have no fear friends: it's a terrible flu, but it is manageable, and we swine veterans will be here to help you through it. Here's to good health."

WFDS

488...Air Canada: Where The Customer

Is always the customer.

Case in point is Dr. Henry Coopersmith of Montreal who kept getting woken up during his flight from Montreal to Paris. Like three times. Just because there was a panicky passenger and he is a doctor. The nerve.

CBC.ca reports that Small Claims Court in Montreal has awarded the Doc 1000 $ for his trouble, a tad less than the 3,058 $ he asked for but a lot more than the 10,000 points Air Canada offered.

WFDS

469...Drew And Mike Reunited On WRIF

http://www.wrif.com/

The finest morning show ever, Drew and Mike on Detroit's Rock Station, WRIF, is back.

Officially according to their website, Drew and Mike, Drew Lane and Mike Clark, who were number one in the most competitive media market on the planet, are going to be reunited July 13th; right now they are running vintage Drew and Mike. Detroit is the only market that Howard Stern, who is the most popular morning show host in history, recall that he went number one in one ratings period in both Montreal and Toronto, couldn't crack the top ten in the Motor City.

The Detroit News is reporting that the pair have signed a multi year deal so they will be on air for eons.

If you haven't listened, listen.

WFDS

389...Michael Jackson Died Thursday

Ladies and gentlemen, Michael Jackson died Thursday.

Radio died right along with him. Most radio stations just kept John Tesh rolling, Ryan Seacrest babbling and voice tracking mindlessly ploughing through the playlist.

When John Lennon and Elvis Presley died, decades before consolidation, national program directors and big chains controlling everything from Toronto, Montreal, New York and Los Angeles most stations were immediately broadcasting on-air tributes, news accounts and playing wall-to-wall dead guy music.

In my town the only station that I heard going wall to wall Michael was the station that I am with, 93.1CKCU, which has, and this is a positive, a laissez faire attitude towards programming. Although the hit stations in town, TAG FM, KISS and HOT did talk about Michael Jackson they also played the songs that were programmed weeks, days, months ago. If anything, CFRA, the local right wing news talker and CBC ONE, the lefty news talker, were more on the story than the contemporary stations.

Not hating, just stating.

Score one for local TV, like Local4 in Detroit, stations that were out on the street in their towns and a big one for the Internet.

WFDS

343...I Lied

Again.

More Hockey.

Front page of The Gazette, Montreal's Anglo newspaper, trumpets the sale of the Montreal Canadiens to the Molson family.

The brewers of Export and other fine ales, the Molson's have owned the Habs off and on since 1957 and are now back in the game paying 550 million, give or take, to George Gillett for an operation that he bought from them for 275 for at the turn of the century.

Would some one please forward this to Gary Bettman with the note that, Mr. B., franchises in towns that enjoy hockey, like Montreal, Ottawa, Hamilton, appreciate. Towns like, oh say Phoenix, not so much on the appreciation.

WFDS

331...Speaking Of Montreal

Crescent Street is celebrating its 50th anniversary this summer.

There was a great story in the Montreal Gazette yesterday about how this summer marks the 50th summer of partying on Crescent. For those of you not familiar with Montreal, Crescent is in the west end of the city, and when referring to Crescent Street it is generally assumed that one means Crescent between Maisonneuve and St. Catherine's.

Truly an interesting part of the world. I would posit that on a summer night, like tonight, if one stands at the corner of St. Catherine and Crescent you will see a plethora of beautiful [as in cover of Vogue] women and [GQesque] men parade by. The most beautiful.

Spectacular.

WFDS

214...Prime Minister Michael Ignatieff

Say it out loud.

Really sounds nice eh? A sound full of promise.

Last night at a fundraiser in Montreal the next Prime Minister of Canada said he will restore arts funding that all but sunk the Conservatives in La Belle. The Toronto Star report this morning goes on to state that Mr. Ignatieff promised to reinstate arts and culture programs savaged by the Conservatives.

Mikey Mike went on to say that "I want a government that understands that (Cirque du Soleil founder) Guy Laliberte, (playwright) Robert Lepage, and (composer) Robert Charlebois aren't just artists," he offered, "but symbols of the creative energy that we want to display in all the population." He didn't mention my personal favourite, Julie Snyder of Star Academie and Le Banquier but that was a mere oversight.

The future does look bright; the new look Liberal Party has now pulled even with the Bloc Quebecois in the polls, leaving the Tories in the dust.

WFDS