864...From Witchita Via Tulsa

Found this lovely piece on WTUL, a Tulsa TV station but the unbylined story is out of Witchita, Kansas:

A tender moment in a trash bin went all wrong for a couple who found themselves being held up at pocket knifepoint.

Wichita police say two 44-year-olds had climbed into a Dumpster to be alone just after 6 p.m. Saturday when two men interrupted them and demanded their belongings. Officers say the man and woman were engaged in "an intimate moment" when they were robbed of their shoes, jewelry and the man's wallet.

Police say one of the robbers was a 64-year-old man who egged his 59-year-old companion on during the robbery.The suspects were found a short time later and the stolen property was returned.

I suspect alcohol may have been involved.

WFDS

677...Pedophiles And Cops Talking Dirty

It is official now, writes Wired.com, the only people chatting dirty on line are pedophiles and cops pretending to be kids.

Last Thursday, a federal appeals court upheld both the conviction of an Indiana man and redefined the concept of being a loser. The man, James Daniel, is a bit of freak and into young girls in a deviant way. Mr. Daniel's online efforts to proposition underage girls in chat rooms led him to not one, not two, but three undercover cops, none of whom apparently knew about the others.

Strike one.

Strike two.

Strike three.

Which translates into 17 plus years of jail time for Mr. Daniels, time that I am sure will just fly by considering the esteem child molesters are held in by other prisoners. Then, when he gets out, life supervision. Life just keeps getting better and better.

By the way there’s no evidence in the record that he ever succeeded in talking with a real underage girl.

WFDS

675...Breaking Into Jail

Not done often but it has now been done. Tuesday night in Gatineau, the town across the river from Ottawa, a city well known for cheap beer, strippers and cheap beer, a 20 year old man showed up at the Hull detachment on De La Carriere looking for a place to spend the night.

The sergeant on duty explained the Gatineau police are not hoteliers and referred him to community resources.

Not good enough for buddy; he left the station and proceeded to smash the windows of the station. Problem solved re sleeping indoors: the cops arrested the fool for vandalism and he appeared in court Wednesday.

Only in La Belle Province where the unthinkable happens on a regular basis.

WFDS

609...Tasers In The News Part One

In the wake of the British Columbia inquiry into the tasering to death of near immigrant [remember, he hadn't even cleared customs yet] and Polish citizen, Robert Dziekanski, police forces across the land are instituting rules on the use of Tasers.

What the f'k was going through their heads previously, I mean you give the police a toy that sends a gazillion volts [or amps or something] through 'dirt bags', and let them use it at their own discretion, i.e., no rules and then, eek, someone gets killed and there is some sort of suprise.

Now there are rules and, according to Dawn Walton's story in Saturday's Globe and Mail, they are going to be enforced in Alberta or else. Or else, something.

Beauty.

WFDS

454...Tasers In The News:Don't Run With Scissors

My mom told me that.

Your mom told you that.

Daniel Gilberg's mom did not tell him that.

KTLA TV in Los Angeles reports that a drunk, nude man covered in his own blood was tasered and arrested by police as he tried to flee a hospital armed with scissors.

Mr. Gilberg, 42, was being treated at the emergency room of Ventura County Medical Center for a head injury he suffered in a fall. While being treated he became impatient, like who hasn't got impatient in emerg? Mr. Gilberg yanked out IVs and a catheter, yes, a c a t h e t e r, ow. He then threatened two nurses with scissors, according to police and ran, ran, ran away.

Not real far though. Mr. Gilberg was subdued by two officers who tased his ass and then booked it for assault with a deadly weapon after he was retreated at the hospital.

WFDS

335...Clucking Like A Chicken Illegal In Kingston

Kingston, Pennsylvania that is.

When accompanied by a firearm.

And threats to shoot.

WNEP16 in Scranton, Pennsylvania, the home of The Office, reports that Gerald Wiernusz is as dumb as a bag of hammers. That isn't the exact way they framed the story, but they could have.

Mr. Wiernusz got hisself locked up in Luzerne County after police said he threatened children with a gun and clucked like a chicken. The cops said a group of kids were playing basketball when the apparently drunk man waved a weapon and threatened to shoot anyone who came on his property. He then clucked like a chicken.

Mr. Wiernusz faces assault and terroristic threat charges in Luzerne County and is looking at many, many, many years in jail.

WFDS

286...Karma Is A Comedian

Just minding my own business, flipping through the Los Angeles Times and low and behold I come across a tres funny story.

The Po Po in El Segundo, California have popped Over the Wall Foundation director Kendall Craig Farris, by the way you know when they include your middle name they mean business, for selling what he claimed was methamphetamine and ecstasy tablets to an undercover officer.

This Over The Wall Foundation was founded by Mr. Farris and the Marina del Rey based program is stridently and sanctimoniously anti-drug. It grew organically from the publication of Mr. Farris' first book, Drugs, Kids and Crime: Surviving our Drug Obsessed Culture.

Farris was being held on $106,500 bail on charges of selling a substance that he alleged was drugs following Thursday's arrest.

Oh yeah, the dope turned out to be not dope. In other words, the fake was selling fakes.

Liar, liar, pants on fire.

WFDS
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221...Winnipeg, The Porn Capital of Manitoba

Porn is all they are talking about today in balmy Winnipeg where, by the way, there is a frost warning ce soir, par for the course in Winnipeg, I mean, cripes, it is only June. It is the big story, front page in the Winnipeg Free Press, lead on the radio and TV news in the 'peg. It combined with a nice little lawsuit.

Here be the dealy deal.

On one side of the docket is an amateur Winnipeg porn star, Oshean de St. Claire de Guise, and her videographer husband, insisting they've done nothing illegal by cruising local bars looking for subjects to star in and with them in prairie pornos.

On the other side is a pair of Winnipeg sheriff''s officers, the good folks that transport prisoners and the like, who say that they were tricked into acting in an hour long, give or take, porno flick dubbed The Grey Cup Blonde.

Lawyers have been summoned.

WFDS

195...Kids, Don't Smoke Dope In Class

From Russell Barth's Facebook via www.KIROTV.com comes this gem out of the Pacific Northwest.

A student presenting an essay supporting legalization of the evil weed Tuesday morning took out a marijuana joint, lit it, and began smoking it, police said.

For starters, smoking in class, dumb. Secondly, waking and baking, dumb squared.

This happened in Purdy, Washington and according to Pierce County sheriff's detective Ed Troyer, the student smoked the joint during his essay supporting the legalization of marijuana.
He then finished his essay, sat down, finished smoking the joint and then ate the end [my friends tell me it is called a "roach"] after it was fully smoked.

He just didn't eat all of the reefer's remains and after the teacher of the class contacted the school resources officer, a Pierce County sheriff's deputy, the deputy found a small residual amount of marijuana on the student.

The student, a 17-year-old junior with a 3.7 grade-point average, [presumably out of 100],was arrested on charges of possession of marijuana by Pierce County deputies and booked into Remann Hall in Tacoma.

WFDS

185...Make 1,000 Dollars; Help Warren Kinsella

Cut and paste job from my buddy James Bowie's buddy Warren Kinsella's blog:

HELP NEEDED
Monday, June 1, 2009, 08:14 AM
I've received a couple messages from someone named "Warren Kuntsella." They read this way:Warren Kuntsella has commented May 29, 2009,6:52:32 PM Bart....dead like you should be. http://www.haloscan.com/c...sella/entry090529_024919/[reply][delete][moderate]Warren Kuntsella has commented May 29, 2009,6:22:31 PM Only takes one itchy trigger One more widow, one less white nigger..... Wazoo is a cute name for your sons profile..... shame we didn't connect. http://www.haloscan.com/c...sella/entry090529_135043/[reply][delete][moderate] The vague death threat was just deleted, as I do with most of them. But the threat directed at my son takes this to a different level.I'm offering $1,000 for whomever helps me find this person, so that I can make a complaint to the police. Contact me in comments if you can help, please.UPDATE: Thanks for the offers of help coming in here and on Facebook, guys. Here's his IP: 99.231.237.213 UPDATE 2: It's someone who has used the name "Ryder Fell" previously and left this message a few days ago: "At the right time and place - and in the right way - I'll give you a beating you won't ever forget." Under the name "Alistair Macfarlane" a few weeks ago, using the same IP, he wrote: "look like a bunch of cunts to me although the blonde is cute." He's an anti-Kyoto, pro-gun nut who posts at SMD, as well. UK-born and raised, married, dog owner, likes music. His email address is ryderfell@rogers.com.

This time it is serious folks.

WFDS

134...Welcome To Birmingham, Drive Carefully

Saw this with Peter Mansbridge on the CBC last night, check it out.

http://blog.al.com/spotnews/2009/05/alabama_gov_bob_riley_today.html

Crazy thing is they fired these cops for beating on someone.

Dude didn't even die.

How unCanadian that is.

WFDS